lunes, diciembre 04, 2006

CrimboTown Right About Now

Bien, al completar la aventura del Crimbo Town en las cavernas, aparece el CrimboTown en las Montañas:


En el CrimboWeen Spooky Cafe

C'thgn'frg, the Elder Chef

Come closer, plebeian individual, and savor the piquancy of my salubrious, though phantasmal, comestibles! They're so delectable, they'll make you delirious with ecstasy!


gingerbread massacre (50 Meat)
This is a big plate full of gingerbread men who have been hacked, slashed, and broken into pieces. It's all topped with bright-red frosting "blood" and sugary "bones!" Looks like that whole "you can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!" taunt was a little premature.

It Came From Beyond Dessert (75 Meat)
This is an assortment of licorice whips, cunningly decorated to look like tentacles, all attached to a cupcake coated with green frosting. It's absolutely adorable. Or it would be, if the tentacles weren't constantly twitching and snaking around.

vampire cake (100 Meat)
This isn't a cake with an insatiable bloodlust, thank goodness. It's just a little festive cake shaped like a vampire, with candy corn for fangs and a candy cane through its heart. It'd be cute, except it's not casting a reflection in the mirror above the counter.


ecto-nog (50 Meat)
What could possibly make eggnog any tastier? Why, mixing it with a few ounces of fresh ectoplasm, of course! The glass of ecto-nog glows a bright, festive green, and occasionally levitates off the table a little.

hot toady (75 Meat)
This is a lovely mix of honey, tea, lemon, brandy, and frog's breath. Though nothing's more suspicious than frog's breath, this actually smells pretty tasty.

hot choculate (100 Meat)
This ancient vampire recipe is comprised of a mug of hot chocolate, a dash of peppermint schnapps, and a special 'secret ingredient.' Although, given what vampires are known for, it's probably not that big of a secret.

En Linnea's Monster Truck

Lady Linnea, the Scream Queen

AIIIIIEEEE! I mean, welcome, adventurer, to my bone-chilling Crimboween! Mwa-ha-ha-ha!

You've managed to scrounge:
9 spooky lengths of string
8 evil googly eyes
8 spooky wads of stuffing
6 spooky squares of felt
2 spooky wooden blocks
6 spooky toy wheels
And I can make these sanity-shredding delights:

possessed top 1 spooky wooden block
1 spooky toy wheel

killer rag doll 2 evil googly eyes
3 spooky wads of stuffing
2 spooky squares of felt

tree-eating kite 1 spooky length of string
1 spooky felt

incredibly creepy marionette 2 spooky lengths of string
2 evil googly eyes
2 spooky wooden blocks

fancy dress ball 1 spooky stuffing
1 spooky felt

mad scientist's sock monkey 2 evil googly eyes
3 spooky wads of stuffing
1 spooky felt

stuffed alien blob 1 evil googly eye
1 spooky stuffing

vampire duck-on-a-string 1 spooky length of string
2 evil googly eyes
2 spooky wooden blocks
2 spooky toy wheels

razor-tipped yo-yo 1 spooky length of string
1 spooky toy wheel

evil teddy bear 2 evil googly eyes
4 spooky wads of stuffing
2 spooky squares of felt

pet rock 1 evil googly eye
1 spooky wooden block

Y en la Spooky Fright Factory:

You're fighting a bow-making mummy

This is a mummy who has been pressed into bow-making duties for Linnea, the Scream Queen. What better creature for the task than one who comes with his own copious supply of ribbon?


He ties a nice bow for you out of a section of bandage. Aww, isn't that festive, cute, and slightly repulsive all at the same time?

He ties a bow around your legs, then yanks them out from under you. Happy Crimbo! Ooh! Ow! Ugh! Ow!

He tries to summon a sandstorm, but all he can manage is a dust-devil.

He summons a flesh-eating beetle, but you squish it. You clever so-and-so.

He summons a couple of flesh-eating beetles, who do pretty much what you'd expect. Happy Crimbo! Ouch! Eek! Ow! Eek! Ooh!

He tries to tie a bow around your neck, but you untie faster than he can tie.

He wraps you up in ribbon, then pulls the end real fast so you spin around and fall down. Happy Crimbo! Ugh! Ow! Ugh! Ouch! Ow!

He opens his mouth and a swarm of gnats flies out of it. It doesn't really hurt, having a bunch of gnats around you, but it's still pretty freaky seeing them come out like that. I mean, where was he keeping them? Ooh! Eek! Ugh! Argh!

He tries to tie a bow around your legs, but runs out of bandage.

He wraps a bow around your neck. Festive, if it weren't so tight. Happy Crimbo! Ouch! Eek! Argh! Ugh!

You acquire an item: spooky toy wheel
You acquire an item: spooky felt

spooky toy wheel
This is a small, round, spooky wooden wheel. You're pretty sure that if it were in the sky, it'd keep on turning, even with no one near it to make it turn. It looks ready to do some spooky wheeling and dealing.

Selling Price: 18 Meat.

spooky felt
You've never felt felt like this before -- it's slightly warm to the touch, a little bit damp, and appears to be pulsating ever so slightly. It looks like a muppet managed to open that chinese puzzle box. Gah.

Selling Price: 16 Meat.
You're fighting a stocking-stuffing zombie

This zombie has taken time off of its busy shambling-and-lurching schedule to stuff stockings for Linnea, the scream queen. Two guesses what he stuffs the stockings with. Er, with what he stuffs the stockings. Sorry.


He tries to gnaw on your skull, but his teeth are too decayed. He could use an elfin dentist.

He tries to slash you with his fingernails, but they just break off on your thick skin.

He slashes you with his ragged fingernails. Happy Crimbo! Ooh! Ouch! Ow! Argh! Eek!

He tries to stuff your ear into a stocking, but you've got stock in dodging.

He stuffs your head into a stocking. Happy Crimbo! Oof! Ooh! Argh! Ooh! Eek!

He shambles toward you, moaning, but trips over a stocking and falls over.

You're fighting a Cookie-baking Thing from Beyond Time

This is one of the primeval, endlessly malevolent, fiendishly intelligent old gods from before time and space as we know it existed. Currently, it's employed making cookies for Linnea's Crimbo takeover. I guess it's a good way to pass the time between driving mortals mad with one peek at your frightful visage.


It stares at you, gibbering madly, its eyes boring deep into your soul, but you've been to enough comic book conventions that it hardly phases you.

It whips you with its creepy tail. You can tell a creepy tale about it later. Happy Crimbo! Eek! Oof! Argh! Argh!

It gibbers madly at you. You feel your grip on sanity start to slip. Happy Crimbo! Oof! Ow! Oof! Eek!

It tries to buffet you with its wings, but you remain unbuffeted.

It buffets you with its unearthly wings. Looks like it wants to live and let die. Happy Crimbo! Ooh! Eek! Eek! Ow!

It wraps a tentacle around your throat and squeezes until your eyes bug out. Happy Crimbo! Eek! Ooh! Ouch! Eek!

It tries to grab you with a tentacle, but you're not having any of that funny business.

It whips you with its tail, buffets you with its wings, wraps a couple of tentacles around your head and squeezes, all the while stepping on your toes. Yeesh! Ouch! Ooh! Ow! Ow!

It gibbers madly at you, but you gibber sanely back.

It gibbers madly at you. You feel your grip on sanity start to slip. Happy Crimbo! Ouch! Oof! Eek! Eek!

You're fighting a skeletal reindeer

This is one of the reindeer that one of Linnea's mad scientists concocted. Its construction was exceedingly simple. It's pretty damn spooky, all things considered. No one's going to think it's cyoooood at all, and anyone who tries to get them to pull a sleigh is asking for a skeletal hoof through the brainpan.

It moans spookily, but you hum a happy tune. Happy Crimbo!

It sits back on its haunches and lets loose a spooky moan. You get goosebumps on your soul. Happy Crimbo! Oof! Ouch! Ow! Eek!

It tries to smack your noggin with its hooves, but you hoof it away. Happy Crimbo!

It raps on your noggin with its hooves. It would behoove you to dodge in the future. Happy Crimbo! Ugh! Ow! Ugh! Argh! Oof!

It charges you and tries to poke you with its skeletal antlers. Given, however, that skeletal antlers aren't much different than regular antlers, you're prepared to dodge the attack. Happy Crimbo!

It pokes you with its antlers. Looks like you're the antlee. Happy Crimbo! Eek! Ooh! Argh! Oof!

It tries to bite you, but its teeth fall out since there's no gum to hold it in. Remember, floss regularly, kids. Happy Crimbo!

It chomps on your kidney with its skeletal teeth. Er, just regular teeth, I guess. Happy Crimbo! Ouch! Eek! Argh! Ouch! Ugh!

You acquire an item: spooky stuffing

You're fighting a toy-making creature from the Gray Lagoon

No one knows precisely where the Gray Lagoon can be found, least of all the people who make maps for the Kingdom. Safe to say that it's not a popular tourist spot, especially when things like this lurk in the water, waiting to devour unsuspecting swimmers. It's a lot nastier than the creatures from the Blue Lagoon, who just spend all their time lounging around half-naked and making out.

It fires a rubber-tipped styrofoam dart at you. You shrug it off.

It throws a barrage of pointy, unsafe toys at you, then follows up with a few swipes of its fiercely-clawed, webbed hands. You feel like you've taken a guided tour through a paper shredder. Happy Crimbo! Argh! Ow! Ugh! Eek! Ow!

It tries to swandive into your head, but you leap to the side.

It jumps up and does a wonderful swan dive into your head. Happy Crimbo! Ow! Ouch! Eek! Argh! Eek!

It tries to swipe you with its claws, but it moves too slow on land.

It tries to throw marbles at you, but it's lost its marbles.

It throws a bunch of marbles at you. You slip on them and fall, comically. Happy Crimbo! Ooh! Argh! Ooh! Oof! Oof!

It charges toward you, but slows down when it sees its skin is starting to crack. It dives into a nearby puddle and swims around for a bit before continuing the fight.

It puts a couple of sharp toys on the ground, and you inadvertently step on them. Happy Crimbo! Oof! Ow! Ow! Ow! Oof!

Se obtiene:

spooky wooden block

spooky wooden block
Man, you haven't seen one of these since you were a wee adventurer. Made from pressed wood pulp, all eight sides of this thing have some sort of letter on them (not pictured.) The letters all appear to be in some kind of ancient, eldritch script, though. If you spelled the right word, you could probably summon something you'd later wish you hadn't summoned.

Selling Price: 17 Meat.

spooky frank
This is like a sausage, only smaller. And much more spooky. Don't get strung out by the way it looks, though -- don't judge a sausage by its casing.

Uncle Crimbo's favorite food is franks and beans, by the way. Not that that's in any way relevant. Just sayin'.

(Cooking ingredient)
Type: food
Cannot be traded
Cannot be discarded
Quest Item

You're fighting a gift-wrapping vampire

This vampire has taken a break from saahhhking blaaaaahd to wrap gifts for Linnea. If any teddy bears show up mysteriously drained of stuffing and with a thirst for felt, we'll all know who to blame.


He transforms into a big, black dog, but fortunately it turns out he's your godfather. Dogfather?

He transforms into a big, black dog, which makes you sweat and makes you groove. Happy Crimbo! Ouch! Ugh! Ouch! Ouch!

He tries to saaahk your blaaahd, but you pretend you're a stone, so he can't get blood from you.

He wraps you up in ribbon, then pulls the end real fast so you spin around and fall down. Happy Crimbo! Ugh! Ugh! Oof! Argh! Oof!

He tries to gift-wrap you, but you beat the wrap.

He transforms into a bat! Fortunately, it's a baseball bat, which then falls to the ground.

He transforms into a clammy mist. You get run over by a bunch of gorillas. Happy Crimbo! Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! Ouch! Eek!
Al cocinar la Spooky Frank con Enchanted Beans se obtiene

You cook up a delicious new item.
You acquire an item: plate of franks and beans

plate of franks and beans
This is a plate of delicious franks and delicious beans, all covered with whatever that delicious brown goo is that franks and beans usually come in. It's Uncle Crimbo's favorite dish, mainly because cooking it usually involves opening a can and eating it cold.

Type: food
Cannot be traded
Cannot be discarded
Quest Item

Al consumir los Frank and Beans:

You start to chow down on the franks and beans, but before you can take a bite the plate levitates into the center of the room. A deeply tanned arm reaches through a magical portal and grabs the plate. "Thanks, kid," Uncle Crimbo's voice says. "You're getting even closer."